Abe Simpsons: The good Lord lets us grow old for a reason: to gain the wisdom to find fault with everything he's made.
Homer: Old people don't need companionship. They need to be isolated and studied so it can be determined what nutrients they have that might be extracted for our personal use.
Abe Simpson: I may not have a fancy black bathrobe cloak and a hammer like Snooty, but I do have an oatmeal spoon and slippers.
Abe Simpson: I'm an old man and I hate everything but Matlock. Ooh, it's on now!
Homer: Dad. You've done a lot of great things, but you're a very old man now, and old people are useless.
Abe Simpson: I used to be With 'it'. But then they changed what 'it' was. Now what I'm with isn't 'it', and what's 'it' seems scary and wierd. It'll happen to you.
Moe Szyslak: Call this an unfair generalization if you must, but old people are useless at everything.