Mr Burns: You mean you're willing to give up a good job and a raise, just for your principles?
Homer: Hmmmm, you put it that way it does sound a little far-fetched, but that's the lug your looking at... and I vow to continue spending every free minute I have crusading for safety. Of course, I'd have a lot less of those free minutes if you gave me the job.
Mr Burns: You're not as stupid as you look, or sound, or our best testing indicates.
Homer: Kids, kids. I'm not going to die. That only happens to bad people.
Bart: What about Abraham Lincoln?
Homer: He sold poisoned milk to school children.
Marge (to Bart): You know your father wanted to be a police officer but they said he was too heavy.
Homer: No the army said I was too heavy, the police said I was too dumb.
Barney Gumble: An election!?That's one of those deals where they close the bars, isn't it?
Homer: Oh, my God! Space aliens! Don’t eat me. I have a wife and kids. Eat them!
Homer: One day honest citizens are going to stand up to corrupt officials like you.
Chief Wiggum: Really! Have the set a date for it?
Marge: I guess one person can make a difference. But most of the time, they probably shouldn't.
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